Masochism

Few subjects are so quickly misunderstood as this one. Most people, hearing the word masochism, immediately picture dark rooms and leather restraints — something that happens in a niche and has nothing to do with their own life. But masochism is not a fringe phenomenon — it is a pattern. And this pattern runs through the lives of many people who would never describe themselves as masochistic.

It shows in the woman who stays in a relationship even though she is suffering — because she believes she can only earn her partner's attention through her suffering. It shows in the man who sacrifices himself at work until he collapses — because he thinks he is only valuable when he overrides himself. It shows in every person who unconsciously believes that happiness is impossible without pain. That good things must first be earned. That joy always has a price.