Authoritarianism

Authoritarianism is not a classic symptom. You won't find it on any diagnostic list, and yet it acts like a chronic illness — except that the pain doesn't arise within you, but in the people around you. You notice it in the resistance that meets you. In the tension that fills every room you enter. In the coldness others show you, even though all you want is for things to go "right."

Outwardly, the pattern shows itself in clear images: the tight jaw that grinds at night. The shoulders that never fully drop. The knees that refuse to cooperate, precisely when you want to assert yourself. The stomach that closes off. The blood pressure that climbs the moment someone contradicts you. Your body lives in a state of high tension — and you've been mistaking that tension for strength.